$18.99 at FYE will get me a New Life!!


Yes, I too have proclaimed the importance of the "life-changing album," singing its praises from rooftops; the album that stirs your insides out, that acts as holy communion (never mind that Jesus was a homosexual nymphomaniac cocksucking Jew from Galilee, thank you Nervous Gender), that you swear was separated from you at birth, damnit, if only you could somehow DNA-test a CD. But making fun of it is still funny.

listening: "i luv u" ~dizzee

p.s. omfgz, pitchfork's grime-hype makes me want to shoot myself.


in response to the Coldplay bashing of late...

I don't really care that such a ho-hum band as Coldplay sells tons of records and has millions of fans. Plenty other artists that are MUCH worse do just as well, or better. Why aren't we hating on them? Because it's trendy these days among music snobs to hate on Coldplay.

Very well. Not that Coldplay doesn't deserve some of this hateration. Why Rush of Blood to the Head got so many critical accolades beats the hell out of me. What a boring, MOR bunch of songs! Yet the British press (and much of the American press too) went bonkers over the damn thing. What magazine was it that put the album in the Top 20 albums EVER MADE? I mean, that's just ludicrous. And now X&Y is getting a bunch of praise from the mainstream media. Was it Blender or Q that gave it 5 stars? And most other major magazines and newspapers are eating it up, too. Now, I haven't heard X&Y myself, so it's possible (but highly unlikely) that it's just that good. But, uh, 5 is a lot of stars.

See, I don't think we should be irritated with those buying the records. They're just buying albums that they know are guaranteed to be pretty, pleasant, and inoffensive. So be it. I think we should be irritated with the critics and the media. 5 stars? Top 20 albums of all time? What is going on here? I thought music critics had a responsibility to try and uphold a level of artistic integrity in the field. What criteria are they going by here? I always thought that 5 stars should go to artists that challenge the status quo and succeed brilliantly, not those artists who simply maintain the status quo. Perhaps these critics are just writing what their respective bosses tell them to write, for whatever reason (cough cough, GETTING PAID BY THE RECORD LABELS TO WRITE GOOD REVIEWS. ahem.)

So my point is, I don't have all that much aggression towards Coldplay, or even their fans. As was said before, there are many other worse artists to hate on. But what's up with this irresponsible pop criticism? Who's really to blame for the endless praise here?

By the way, Parachutes is actually a pretty decent album, in my opinion. Lick it, haters.



fuck. my computer is fucking fucked. seriously. i've tried everything. no dice. it's slow as balls.

Speaking of balls, today Swain and I wrote the bare bones of what will be a killer rap track called "Lick My NutZ". Though actually, the "Z" in "NutZ" should be backwards.

Okay sorry I haven't updated in a while. Maybe I'll be more up to it as soon as my computer returns to its normal working state... and as soon as I return to mine. Seriously. I need a second job, like, now. Read it: cash money. The beginning and end to all my problemZ.

Oh, and tour turned out all right after all. Yay club.

reading: Psychotic Reactions and Carburetor Dung by Lester Bangs
listening: nothing because I can't type and play music at the same time. fucking computer. (but I was just listening to Tori's live version of "Hoochie Woman" before this)